Luke Sayers' arthouse erotica

When I last wrote about the blockbuster Sayers v Sayers defamation case two weeks ago, I did so with a growing confidence that Luke Sayers and his advisers had dug him a hole that was now overflowing with human excrement. The latest court filings have only solidified that conviction. 

Two weeks back, what I was not yet confident to say was that the high priests of Melbourne at AFL House are headed for their own communal bath in Luke's shit-swamp. What Aussie rules needs is a new Hall of Fame – one dedicated to the Melbourne business chancers who've blown themselves up most spectacularly. Forget about Eddie McGuire; in that sport, Luke Sayers is on the verge of securing himself Gary Ablett's God status. AFL chief executive Andrew Dillon, his former chairman Richard Goyder and Goyder's allies on the AFL Commission could yet share the Norm Smith Medal for most (own) goal assists. Rest assured, none of them will get lost on the way to Luke's scandal dungeon – the AFL's new communications chief Sharon McCrohan could find her way there blindfolded. 

Sayers' January 2025 statutory declaration – provided to AFL general counsel Stephen Meade and Carlton Football Club investigator Christopher Townshend KC (soon thereafter appointed to the Carlton board!) – may yet stand beside Oscar Wilde's evidence in criminal libel proceedings at the Old Bailey in April 1895 as the most self-injurious sworn testimony in surviving popular culture.